Does "The One" Exist?

In order to rival the ridiculous number of my posts re: paper, I am posting yet again about wedding dresses, so that you all know just how truly obsessed I am.

Gather round, kids, so I can tell you about my big revelation during dress shopping. 

Is there "the one"?  You know, "the one" dress that captivates your heart, the one that you must have, the one you feel like you wore everyday in a past life and you were just meant to be together?  I certainly thought there would be.  

Would I just "know"?

Source (Kate looks like she knew, at least about the dress)

What is "just know"ing? That's what some people say about finding your life mate. That you'll just know. It is a very romantic idea and it may be true for some, but I dunno, I'm a little skeptical. I can't tell you how many times that I or my friends have come away from a first date thinking, "Oh could [she/he] be the one?"  Yes, mebbe we're just crazy (we were all around 30, looking for Mr. Life Partner).

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I was talking about dresses, wasn't I? (I just had to post that cartoon, it is hi-LAR-rious.) by the third store or so, I had tried on far too many dresses to be able to think of one dress as my true, destined dress. There are thousands and thousands of dresses out there, new and used, at all different price points and new ones being issued from the runways every day.

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(do you really want to try on this many dresses??)

So while I didn't have a moment where I broke down weeping when I found my dress, I  had done enough research and shopping to feel confident in my choice.  Maybe not such a magical, definable moment, but still magical that I'm going to wear a gown that makes me feel lovely, right?


How do you feel about "the one", dress or otherwise?  Did you "just know" about your dress or partner?

The Two that Got Away

There are two dresses that I think about from time to time during my moments of dress-doubt.  One of the hard things for me about shopping for dresses was eliminating all those that for whatever reason, weren't as good as the top choice.  I know that sounds silly and obvious, but different dresses convey different feelings/moods/qualities and you'd like to be able to take advantage of all of those.

Here were my runner-ups.  Please meet Anya and Arnaude.

I fell in love with the simple elegance of Anya. Anya hails from Amsale, and was so simply chic, elegant, and Jackie O.  This is probably the one time I'm going to say this, but it looked better on me than it does on this model (probably b/c she is too emaciated to fill it out, even a little).

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Alas, I felt that maybe she was *too* sophisticated for me, that the high neckline swallowed me up and imposed on me an older identity than I wanted. 

Finally, there was Arnaude. Oh, Arnaude.  I found Arnaude in a bridal salon called Hitched in Washington DC, a friendly little place in Georgetown.  I just about lost it over this dress:

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My heart actually squeezes a little when I look at this dress.  I even made an appointment to meet the Ulla-Maija designer at an upcoming trunk show so that I could get a better idea of how the draping would look on me.

However, in the end, not meant to be.  The cost of both these dresses was definitely a barrier, and I also felt like maybe the high necklines, albeit bee-yoo-tee-ful, were perhaps not as alluring?  I dunno. I still think these dresses are gorgeous, but that's the way the cookies crumble.

Any dresses you still dream about?

Blitzkrieg Bridal Dress Shopping

When I said I loved to shop for wedding dresses, I meant it. I went to a total of 10 places in NYC, San Francisco, and the Washington DC area.  I also spent hours online looking at preownedweddingdresses.com, hoping to find one of the dream dresses I had tried on for a discounted price. 

On all these trips, my mom was with me. I feel incredibly lucky that we shared the dress shopping experience.  After my sister's wedding 11 years ago, I think my mom was a little burnt out from the wedding planning process (yes, the trauma still lives on after a decade).  But looking for wedding dresses was something that she was still excited about, and that we could do together. 

Originally, I wanted something "understated," "simple," and like an "evening gown". However, one of the Vera Wang dresses my sister practically threw over my head (I was putting up a fight) totally captivated me:

Courtesy of my sister

I'm blinking. The dress is amazing, isn't it? Look at what it does for my figure! I'm actually boy-shaped and straight up and down with not much of a hip-waist differential, but this dress made me look vavoom! The rouched bodice, asymmetrical waistline, and halter strap made me feel sooo pweetty. 

However, I took issue with the poofiness of the skirt. It just felt like too much for the style of our wedding (despite my sister's protests of "who cares??").

I also found the dress below, at Amy Kuschel.  I can't say enough good things about Amy Kuschel--super friendly consultant, a low-key but spacious, airy and bright loft space, and they make the dress to your exact measurements. May I present the Dietrich:

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Our final stop was at Hannelore's, in Alexandria, Virginia. Coincidentally, it is the same salon where my sister bought her dress 11 years ago. I tried on a dress that had a rouched bodice, asymmetrical waistline, and could have a halter strap added. Ooh! Kind of sounds like the Vera, eh? Except that this dress was a Marisa, and the skirt was a gentle fit and flare and not a poof.

And guess what? I didn't take a freakin picture! And for a long time, I couldn't find it anywhere, I mean anywhere, online. I didn't have a style number, and the name the salon wrote down doesn't pop up on google searches (a name which I am not going to share because I don't want you to be unpleasantly surprised, like I was, when porn sites with the names of Marisa and the purported dress name kept popping up).

In the last few weeks, though, my dress has been popping up on "for sale" listings.  So here's a picture from preownedweddingdresses.com.

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You know what pushed me over the edge in buying this dress? My mom saying, "Oh just get it, I'm tired of looking for dresses." I would be, too, Mom--thanks for coming along for the long ride.

What finally made you choose the dress you ended up with?  Did you have a magic moment or just a grumpy mother?

Klingon Dresses

During my much-anticipated wedding dress search, I found myself drawn to a certain style that I had not previously considered.  This said style was elegant, sophisticated, and just altogether dreamy.  A lot of you liked it, and so did I.

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So why am I not wearing one of them? Well, they were made of a charmeuse material (or double-faced silk or something) that clung to the body.  That means every lump, bump, paunch, wrinkle and pimple showed up.

One of these dresses was Ginger by Kenneth Pool.

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I also tried on this dress by Elizabeth Fillmore, called Rose. Isn't that bodice just so sweet?

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I initially thought--hey, nothing a little Spanx wouldn't fix!  But nope, no dice.  You could clearly see the outline of the Spanx girdle underneath the dress.  It was almost funny. But not.

I'm not stupid--I know I'm a small person.  But I'm also not stupid enough to deny that I have some body dysmorphia, as many women do (try and figure out that double negative).  As much as I would have really loved to wear one of these dresses, I felt uncomfortable in them and self-conscious.  I tried to tell myself that wearing a dress l ike this would be good for me, that it would encourage/force me to feel better about my body because I would look SO HOT (or so I would like to have thought).  But in the end, I didn't know whether buying a dress would really change a pattern of thought and self-perception that's been built over too many years. And that's the rub. And lub, and wrinkle, and bub.

Anyone feel drawn to a style of dress that didn't end up working for you? 

Dressing the Big One

Last time I wrote about dressing the little ones, and now it's about me! ME!

Let me start off by saying that I have dreamt all my life about wedding dress shopping. Once, while still in college and very far from being married, my mom and I dropped by a David's Bridal and I tried on a dress. I'm sure the staff looked at my mom and wondered whether she was trafficking a 13-year old child bride (I look young).

Wedding dress shopping was one of the main reasons I was looking forward to getting engaged. Yeah, I know, so materialistic compared to the whole-marry-my-best-friend thing, but so what? I wanted the private room, the bridal consultant, my loved ones waiting for me to emerge, oh the rapture! I couldn't wait to maybe find "the one" that made me inexplicably break out into tears and hug my mom.

The first place I visited was Designer Loft in NYC. I met with Laura, a bridal consultant, who was very sweet and picked out some great dresses for me (pics from Designer Loft taken by my dad).

This was the kind of dress that I had originally envisioned, and I really liked it. This is by Janet Nelson Kumar.

I hadn't considered the kind of dress shown below because it seemed too slinky, but I rather liked it (my parents were huge fans).

Clearly my signature pose is hugging my lower belly, because it's shy or something.

This was an eco-friendly dress by Adele Wechsler. I actually couldn't stop grinning when I wore this. However, I felt it wasn't flowy enough for me.

Did you look forward to the dress shopping experience?  Did you find yourself liking styles that you had not previously considered?

Dressing the Little Ones

Some of you may scoff in disdain at this post. Don't comment. Really. Because I will flood you with nasty private messages, find out where you live and...oh wait, too far?

Amongst our family members, we have four pugs. I'm sure most of you pet owners out there will understand when I say that these pugs are family to us.  Before I got my pug I kind of laughed at how obsessed people were with their pets--I have now happily and shamelessly joined their ranks.  For a while I made her food from scratch, we bring her on trips, and we have multiple coats, rain coats, winter booties, and a Halloween costume for her (not that you need these things to be a true pet lover, I am just lame that way).  Here the victims of our adoration.

Courtesy of my sister

While they won't be walking down an aisle, because that would pretty much turn into a furious hunt for treats, we wanted them to have a little pizazz for pre-ceremony photos.

I looked on Etsy and found these flowered dog collars made by Pecan Pie Puppies. They are about $20-24.

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How cute are they? Plus the pugs could wear them afterwards. So it wasn't *really* a wedding expense (i.e. not going on the expenditure spreadsheet!).

I love hydrangea so I'm eyeing this one for my little puglet.

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Anyone else gussying up their pet for the wedding? Don't be shy--can't be as embarrassing as what I just revealed.

A Big Rock For Me

No, not on my finger, but on my earrings.

I am kind of a bwaaak! bwaaak! (supposed to be a chicken squawking) about buying things over the internet, particularly if I know I can see and touch them in a store.  So before I could take the plunge and buy one of the pair of earrings that I found on the internet, I decided to visit some stores in the Fashion District (mainly Seventh Ave between 37th and 38th Streets) to see some earrings in person. 

There were many good, affordable options but I didn't find anything that really grabbed me. So after searching high and low on the internet, and several storefronts, of all places I headed to Macy's, which is typically a place to be avoided at all costs, at least in NYC (like a poultry factory farm--too close quarters).

Lo and behold, I found my earrings for $50.

  

Courtesy of me

Yeah, yeah, so again, my photography skills sucka.  The cellphone in there for scale, although it occurred to me that you have no idea how big the cellphone is.  So here's another pic with me wearing the earrings, looking very fierce if I say so myself:

 

Please, please, refrain from all the posts commenting on how attractive I look in this picture.

What kind of jewelry, if any, will you be wearing for your wedding (besides your ring/s)?