The Big Ol' Wish List

Last time I wrote about how Kevin and I already have a lot of popular registry items.  So where did that leave us in terms of registering?  Oh ho, don't worry, we were not at a loss.  Not here.  I am happy to report, to what I'm sure is your great relief, that we indeed found some items that we are really really really excited to put on our registry.

Want to know the fancy* stuff? (because who cares about the microplane I registered for to replace my dying one...)

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It's an end-grain, 20x14 inch cutting board.  End-grain boards are the sturdiest, least prone to warping, and supposedly keep your blades in shape longer.  But also, isn't it pretty? At first I thought it looked kind of funky but now I LOVES IT.

*I realize at this point it may be dawning on you that my version of "fancy" is pretty lame, but I can't hear your thoughts.  Lalalalalala....

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This 4-quart casserole is the size that I'm missing.  The pot I have is 8 quarts--huge.  I don't  want to lug that thing out when I want to boil a small batch of pasta, cook some potatoes, etc. And so cute!

 

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These Chilewich placemats cost more than cloth placemats--but let me tell you, after years of entertaining, I am so over the cloth placemat thing.  The staining, the washing, the ironing, the wrinkling...no more! These babies are made of vinyl, and very attractive.

Okay, that's enough of a glimpse into my greedy little side.

Are there items on your registry about which you are particularly excited? 

On Being Slightly Aged

With an emphasis on the "slightly", people, don't get carried away.  I'm 33--by no means the youngest or the oldest of brides out there.  However, I am above the average age of a bride, both nationally (26.9 years) and locally (NYC--29 years). 

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I've been trying to think of how my age and all that comes with it have affected my wedding planning. It's a tough call, since the impetus for any wedding-related decision is usually multi-fold--my choices are influenced not just by my age, but also by budget, personal priorities, and so on.

But one thing I felt did demonstrate my age more than other details is our registry.

I've been living in apartments for 11 years since college, 7 of those in my own apartment, and 2-3 of them with Kevin. Over the years that I've been building a home, I've treated myself to some things for which people usually wait to register, particularly in the cooking area.


What do we already have?  Here are some popular registry items that we have, and my two cents (whether you like it or not). We have this...

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The highly touted KitchenAid mixer--it was actually a hand me down, but point is that I have it so I won't be registering for it.  I love this because I like to bake, but I don't think it's worth the expense unless you bake a lot--there are handheld mixers and less $$$ stand mixers out there that work perfectly well.

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Cuisinart food processor--works great, pain in the ass to clean without a dishwasher.  Dammit I wish I could register for a dishwasher.  There are newer models of this--if you like to cook, chances are you want one of these.

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Calphalon anodized cookware--I've had this set for about 10 years (an older verison).  My advice?  If you are familiar with how you cook and which pots/pans you use, buy them a la carte instead of as a set.  I am registering for a few pieces that I use constantly from the All-Clad, because, well, just because (okay I'm a sucker for the reputation and quality! I think of it as an upgrade! I'm a snob!).

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Wusthof knives.  I've learned that what I use most is the chef's knife (7-8") and a paring knife, and really could have gone a la carte on this. (don't forget a bread knife)

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Le Creuset 5 1/2 quart Dutch oven.  This is my workhorse.  And I leave it out on the stovetop because it looks nice.  I make sauces, soups, stews, and braised goodies in this.

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These Christy towels are THE BEST towels I've ever had.  Absorbent, thick, hold up really well (wash a few times beforehand to get the lint off).  They go on sale a lot at Bloomingdales--don't buy at full price, fool! (get it? full, fool? I kill me)

 

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400-count sateen sheets.  We got these at a mega-sale at Bloomie's. They're nice, but really, Mr. Pug is the linen lover so this is more up his alley. I guess they'd be great if he didn't drool on them all the time (kidding).


Any registry advice out there? Things you wish you had registered for, things you wish you hadn't?

Drink Up, Buttercup

Different families have certain activities/traditions that they enjoy together, and my family likes...to drink together (moderately, of course)! Our motto is: The family that drinks together, stays together!*

I know, not very active or creative, but we really do enjoy a nice cocktail/bubbly/munchie hour before sitting down to a big homemade dinner (courtesy of my sister and her kitchen b#tch (me)).

Family time for us is filled with scenes like this:

(my brother in law, becoming a true member of the family)

 

The fam enjoying after-dinner port. Notice champagne and wine glasses strewn across table.  Guess I decided not to get gussied up for dinner, not even remotely. Mr. Pug has red-eye.

 

We even try to get the pugs in on the action (and Mr. Pug *still* has red-eye.  Maybe he's the devil.)

So in thinking about what should be our specialty cocktail for the wedding, I knew immediately what we were going to serve.

Bee's Knees!!

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This is my family's recent cocktail of choice.  What is a bee's knees? Well let me tell you. It is a delicious concoction made out of a lavender-honey syrup, gin, and limes. It's divine.  We served it at a party once and pitchers--PITCHERS, folks--were drained.

Plus, the lavender happens to go along with our color scheme, but honestly we could have been planning a neon pink and green wedding, and I would have still served this.

You can find the recipe here and plenty of other places on the internet, but here's the quick rundown:

• 1/4 cup hot water 
• 1 teaspoon dried lavender blossoms
• 1/4 cup honey
• 6 tablespoons gin
• 2 tablespoons lemon juice

Mix hot water and dried lavender blossoms in bowl. Let steep 5 minutes. Whisk in 1/4 cup honey. Strain into another bowl. Add 3 tablespoons of the honey syrup, gin, and lemon juice; strain into cocktail shaker with ice. Shake well and strain into 2 chilled Martini glasses.

Drink up! 

Are you having a specialty cocktail?  How did you choose which drink to serve?

*My family members are strictly social drinkers--this is not meant to encourage/condone/make light of alcoholism, which is something entirely different.  I am familiar with how alcoholism can hurt a family, and I would never imply that that kind of illness is funny.

What Cooking a Pug Taught Us

No, we didn't really cook a pug.  But what does this:

...have to do with our relationship? (that was about as far as I could get this terrified pug into a pot--oops)


I'm Korean American, Kevin is Ukrainian/Polish/Euromix Caucasian.  Whatever.  Point being that I'm a person of color (some people don't like that label, so insert whatever you please), and Kevin is not.  

Even in this day and age where one would hope that society is color-blind, that's wishful thinking--not that we haven't come a long way.  In addition--and this is obvious--there is something about having walked your whole life in *your* shoes that shapes your experiences partly because of how people treat you--overtly, subtly, consciously and unconsciously.  This contributes to who you are as a person, and no one can really understand that.


It's akin to the difference many people perceive regarding the gender divide.  While parts of our society have greatly advanced in breaking down gender barriers, any person will tell you that it's just different when you've walked around as a man/woman your whole life.


Anyway, where am I going with this.  Kevin and I had had the occasional race conversation here and there, but nothing too earth-shattering.  A few years ago, he unexpectedly learned a little of what walking in my shoes was like.




We were traveling on the subway to the airport for the Thanksgiving holiday.  I had my pug in a carrier on my lap, and she was poking her head out.  Kevin was sitting in a different part of the crowded subway car, across the aisle from me.

(okay, these are 2 pugs, and not on a subway, but imagine the one on the left being by herself in a carrier, on my lap, in the subway)

There were two men standing by the doors, closer to Kevin.  They looked at me and my pug and said something between themselves and chuckled.  I assumed they were amused, as many people are, by the sight of our pug.


When we got off the train, Kevin walked quickly to me to take my hand, with a look of concern on his face.  He said, "Honey, I think I know how you feel."  He explained that the two men, whose conversation Kevin could overhear, were saying something like:

Man #1:  Hey, look at that Asian lady with the dog.
Man #2:  Oh yeah, over there.
Man #1:  Uh oh, I hope that dog knows that it's going to be Thanksgiving dinner!
Man #2:  [Laughs]


I don't remember the exact words, but it was very clear to Kevin that they made the joke because I'm Asian, and the stereotype about Asian people eating dogs.  They snickered and laughed, while Kevin sat there, offended and hurt. By the way, not that this means one thing or another (it did to me), but the two men were police officers.



Those few lines really shook Kevin.  He felt he got a glimpse through a window at the stereotypes that some people make and direct my way. It helped him better understand my experience.


Granted, this doesn't mean that Kevin totally understands what it means to be a person of color, the same way I don't understand exactly what it means to be a White man.  Also granted, the subway exchange was a fairly overt act of racial/ethnic stereotyping, and not necessarily the nuanced treatment that occurs more frequently and can have a larger part in shaping who you are.



Nevertheless, in a way I'm glad it happened.  Anything that can help me and Kevin understand each other better is a good thing.


Any experience in your relationship allow you to walk in your partner's shoes and help you learn something?

Ring, Meet My DIY Skills

So, my ring was in search of a place to rest its heavy, spiky head at the end of the day.  I kept my I-must-purchase-something instinct in check, and instead of buying a ring bowl or other holder, I decided to make do with my bare hands (good job me!).

As a little background, while I've been DIY-ing the stationery for our wedding, I can't craft anything that is 3D. I can print stuff, but not craft. There's a distinction, okay?

But now, hive, I will flex my DIY muscle and show you truly how crafty I am. Prepare yourself.

*Disclaimer--before you get too excited, please also prepare yourself for the heavy dose of good-natured sarcasm ahead.

Steps for DIY ring holder:

1. Look around your home for something round.  Spot old-school Korean teacup (teamug?) on shelf.  Remove from shelf.

2. Take off top of teamug.  Look at insides for fun.

The perforated inner bowl is where you put the tea leaves, and the hot water goes into the main vessel. Put the perforate inner bowl in main vessel, and steep! Simple, no? And completely irrelevant to this post.

3. Take top...

4. Flip over...

5. Place ring inside. Ta-daaaaaa!!!! You're done.

I hope this tutorial was helpful to you. I now proudly place my ring holder on my kitchen counter, right near our front door, so I can take it off first thing when I get home.  Let me know if you have any questions! (hehe)

On a slightly serious note, though, I am actually quite pleased whenever I plonk my little Taz into this bowl.  I didn't make it myself, but *somebody* made it, right? And it's better than just leaving it on my kitchen counter, which I used to do, and which led to several panicked instances of not being able to find the ring among garlic bulbs, onions, and salt pot that grace my counter.  I think I am *so* clever.

Is this your kind of DIY, or are you blessed with a little more skill?

Resting Ring

As you know, my ring looks like this:

Spikey, no?

My pugs' eyes look like this:

All vulnerable and protruding googly eyes.

When I come home, if I've remembered to wear my ring, I like to take it off ASAP and put it somewhere secure so I can pet my dogs with abandon, and not worry about gouging out their eyes. (Will not go into detail about the time where I accidentally hit my dog's lower eyelid with the ring and she kept it shut for 2 days (was actually 2 minutes)--there was some serious panic and guilt, and Kevin restraining me from having a breakdown.)

What to use? Where to rest my ring? Well, I could use a ring pillow:

Weddingbeepro Llubav!  Yes, it would be random for me to have a Mexican-inspired image at my wedding so don't worry, I will not culturally appropriate it.  But still, it's super cool, isn't it.

Llubav again! I luv Llubav.

Totally cute for a wedding, but I'm not sure I would use it again as a more permanent storage option. 

A ring bowl?

The ever-popular Paloma's Nest

I love the creamy simplicity and the brief yet touching engravings.

Or, some creative ideas from the hive:

Is it a book? Is it a textbook? Is it a plane? 

No, it's a...

Ring book! (Photos ripped from Mrs. Sprinkle's post)

Or how about something that puts a little smile on your face? 

Reader kjpugs' cute little giraffe that she got from redenvelope

Or a ring box, made by Mrs. Gloss (something involving a laser cutter--whoa there stop right now!)

Can you believe she made these?

Well, not to be shown up by Mrs. Gloss, I decided that I would also forego the expense of purchasing a resting place for my ring and come up with something on my own.  Next time!

Where do you keep your rings when you're not wearing them?

Ring, Meet World

After the *overwhelming* number of requests (all 3 of 'em) to see more pictures of my ring, I've decided to post a little more about it.

Considering how I usually am, I thought I would spend eons researching what kind of engagement ring would suit me best. I imagined becoming lost in a vast new lexicon of settings, shapes, cuts, what have you.  However, without considering any ring very seriously, I ended up with this:

The ring getting a piggyback (or duckyback) ride from the infamous duck

Kevin and I picked out the ring together, in a little jewel of a shop in Soho that we found by accident.  They had cufflinks made of silver in this shape but without the stone, and a silver ring in this shape with a small sapphire in the center.

While I usually wear silver-toned jewelry, it looked a little too ice princess "Queen of Narnia" to me (although still very pretty), so I asked for it in the yellow gold to lend some more warmth. And for some reason I fixated on having a pink sapphire.  I do not know why. Moving on.

The ring and the pinecone (and Christmas ornaments and lots of other crap)

The ring hanging for its dear life on the Christmas tree

The ring and the pug, right before I had to snatch it out of the jaws of a suddenly, unexpectedly hungry pug

So there's my ring.  To be honest, I kinda felt like "the search" went by very quickly, almost haphazardly. Where were the unmentionable amounts of time perusing rings and the internet? In the end, it just clicked.

I was thinking of nicknaming the ring "Taz", as short for the Tasmanian devil, but the ring kinda looks hyper happy, you know?

Did you spend a long time selecting your ring or did it happen pretty quickly?