Does Everything Have to be Interesting?

I've hit a certain point in planning where the dreaming/imagining phase is over, and I need to make some concrete decisions.  Not about the big stuff, like venue, dress and whatnot, but about the myriad of details--programs (what paper, content, where should we put it, what should hold them, how many should I make), favors (what favor, how to present it, where to put it), table numbers (design, buying the paper, what will hold them up), etc.

It's like a bucket of ice in the face.  Now I have to make *real* decisions that have *actual* consequences, and there are a lot of them. Like being an adult, dammit. I fully realize that I'm bringing this upon myself, by feeling that each decision needs to contribute to make our wedding "interesting" and "personal" and "memorable" and "better than winning the lotto jackpot."

Por ejemplo, table numbers.  Why oh WHY can't I just be okay printing out some numbers in Times New Roman, 100 point font, Scotch-taping that sucker to the floral centerpiece and calling it a day?

Well, I'm going to blame the rest of you and the brides that have preceded me. I'm kidding! Well, I mean it in a good way--I feel that brides share so many great ideas about details for their wedding that it's just nearly impossible to resist incorporating some of that inspiration.

How far does one have to go in order to find really cool table number ideas?  Not very far, turns out.

Mrs. Spider's cousin

Aaawww.  This would be a great way to incorporate the pugs. Like the one sticking all her paws into my arm right now, as hard as she can.  This would also mean that I would need to take pics of the dogs and wear my crazy even more loudly.

Mrs. Lovebug

Engagement pics of me and the man? I kinda like it--we get to use our engagement photos for another purpose (although come to think of it there hasn't been any other purpose, so maybe I should just say to give our engagement photos "a" purpose), plus it's personal and cute.

Mrs. Perfume

Or table "numbers" based on locations? That would be cool. For Mr. Pug and myself, we could name the tables after our favorite bakeries.

Mrs. Taffy

While I would never want anyone to think that I would attempt this DIY project (it involved pencils, multiple layers of paper, circles, and a whole lotta other stuff that stressed me out), I LOVE these.  Mrs. Taffy--are you reading this? I LOVE these.

Oh the choices, the choices!

Who knew that choosing a table number design could be a process that can take days, much less over an hour? I fully realize that I'm being disingenuous here, that if I'm really going to complain about the weight of making choices then I should just chill out and not care, but truth be told it's mostly fun, just a little tiring once in a while.  And it's much easier to write a grumpy post sometimes.  It just flows out of me.

Ah. That was therapeutic.  So, what are you doing for table numbers? And what wedding-detail decision has taken inordinately more time than you wanted/expected it to?

How Cute Can a Cookie Be?

Pretty damn cute, as far as I've seen.  We want to do edible favors so that people would be more likely to take/eat them--plus my sister and I wanted to do something a little homemade for the wedding.  We've decided on little lavender and lime shortbread cookies that we are going to stack in cellophane bags, and tie up with a ribbon.  Cute, huh?

Well, I did have what I thought was a cute idea until, in what seems to be a constant rule whenever I click on over to marthastewartweddings.com, Martha Stewart and her minions showed me what "cute" really looks like. To compensate for my feelings of lameness, I darted some feisty commentary back at the screen.  That'll show her!

Source

(First off, I'm not icing cookies with letters on them. I am also NOT twisting and tying TWO ends of cellophane when one end will do)

 

Source

(So I just have to buy little $5 boxes, line them with edge-punched tissue, make around 12 cookies per person, and tie each box with string? So easy!!!!)

 

Source

(Hmm, if *only* I can get our cookies to be lopsided *just so*)

 

Source

(This is actually more what I was thinking in terms of the actual cookie bags, but mine will just be slapped down on a table, no tiers involved)

 

Source

(Um, no)

Fine Martha minions, you win (if any of you take up these cute packaging ideas I salute you! I'm just too lazy to do that kind of thing).

Anyway, speaking of favors, I also decided that it would be efficient to have the cookies double as escort cards by attaching tags with people's names and the table number.  Here are some examples of edible escort cards.

Source 

 

Source

If this all works out, hopefully I will be showing you pictures of the final product after the wedding.

What were your escort cards like? Would you eat lavender and lime shortbread cookies? (Hint: the correct answer is "Yes!!!")

Well I Guess that Answers the Question

Who watches Say Yes to the Dress on TLC? 

Source

(funny enough, I found this image by typing in "asian girl raising hand" in google)

If I had 50 hands, I'd raise them all.  But let's back up a second.

You know that whole thing about not letting the groom see you in the dress before the wedding? When I first started wedding planning, I decided this was a silly rule and that I would let Kevin see the dress.  Maybe I wouldn't shove it in his face and try it on for him, but I wouldn't make any effort to hide it, either.

Then as time passed, I thought wouldn't it be nice if it were a big surprise?  Wouldn't it be kinda cool to see the expression on his face as he saw me for the first time in full regalia, with admiration, love and amazement in his eyes?  I would just DAZZLE the bejeebs outta him.

 

Source (somewhat of the effect I would be looking to have on him--although not quite as mopey)

But then again, meh. I don't know.  I was on the fence.

Then one day, Kevin and I were sitting on the couch and Say Yes to the Dress was on (I was watching, he was surfing the internet).  And this bride was wearing a dress that looked *awfully* like mine, and I said to Kevin "Huh, I think that's my dress", and Kevin looked up from his computer.  The camera switched to another bride, and I watched impatiently to see when they would cruise back to "my" dress.  Then they flashed the screen showing the dress and the designer.  We have a winner! It was my dress.  

Source (This is not me, the bust area is a big giveaway--I wish!.  I promise to have pics of me in my dress when I go in for my fitting)

Kevin went back to surfing the internet.

Well, gee whiz--*thanks* TLC! I guess you answered my question!

I wasn't upset, but more stunned that *someone else* was wearing *my* dress on TV. How dare she.  Later that day, I asked Kevin if he was upset about seeing my dress. He sighed, rolled his eyes, and said "I don't even remember what the dress looks like." Keeper.

And you know, I don't think Kevin will even remember what my dress looks like after he sees me in it at the wedding.  It's just not on his radar.  And that's okay with me--I know he's going to think of me as a beautiful bride and that's what matters.  Furthermore, let's be honest, I got the dress for ME! Mememememememe. Not for him.

Did you let your future hubby see the dress before the wedding? Why or why not?

The Artichoke Has Landed

Last time I left you with a sad, sorry picture of what was me during the search for an invite motif.  I sat in front of the computer for hours, typing in search after search in Google Images.  Kevin went to bed.  Even the pug went to bed.  It was just me, the upteenth showing of a Cake Boss episode, and the internet.  And finally, I found it...an artichoke!

It was perfect. The most perfect artichoke.  Okay, I know what you're thinking (an artichoke? ok DORK), but just look at the artichoke:

Source

(copyrighted by Bobbi Angell--do not use without permission!)

Some of you may still think that I'm weird, but I love this artichoke.  It's a beautiful drawing.  It's drawn by Bobbi Angell, who drew for the New York Times Home & Garden for over 10 years.  Her work is copyrighted, and being the good law-abiding citizen that I am, I emailed her and asked what the fee would be to use the drawing.

And held my breath.  I didn't have high hopes. I was thinking $200, at the lowest $150, which would be a deal-breaker.  She wrote back in 30 minutes, letting me know that the fee was....$50! I can do that! I can totally do that! Yesyesyesyesyesyesyesyes yippee!!!!!

My level of excitement was absurdly high.  After everything was settled with Bobbi, she sent me high resolution files of two versions of the artichoke.

Artichokes are not only appropriate for spring, the time of year when we're getting married, but Half Moon Bay is well-known for its artichokes! They're even going to be on our menu! Oh my g I'm getting so giddy again writing about it.

Is it possible to love an artichoke? Because I think I do.

I swear, it'll look good. I'll show you.

How did you decide what design/motif to use for your invites?

Invite Decomp

Do you find that you look back on certain aspects of wedding planning and are totally mortified by the lack of perspective which influenced the process?  Let me introduce to you one of my favorite words, and one that could be applied to myself, um, more than once.

de·com·pen·sa·tion 

n.

1. Medicine Failure of the heart to maintain adequate blood circulation, marked by labored breathing, engorged blood vessels, and edema.

2. Psychology The inability to maintain defense mechanisms in response to stress, resulting in personality disturbance or psychological imbalance. 

This describes the state of mind in which I found myself one evening, growing delirious with the difficulties of picking a motif for our invites.  I was one second despondent, the next second giggling, and shooting annoying emails to my sister at a rate of 5 emails per minute.

Source

 I think our last conversation ended with her saying "I can't deal with you anymore, you're decompensating."  I didn't even know what she meant until I looked it up.

How did I get here?  It started innocently enough.  I wanted my friend K to create a line drawing of the coastline at Half Moon Bay so that we could use it on our invites.  We went through multiple iterations (okay, about 24).  And finally, being the gracious bride that I am in accepting my friend's free services, I decided that I *no longer* wanted a coastline.  The drawings were great, it was more my own flawed concept. *Blush*

It was up to me to find something, and quick. I searched. And searched. But I was having a hard time, and by "hard" I mean stressful and miserable, because I had put my friend through all this work only to change my mind at the end, and I had to find something that would work and represent us and the style of the wedding and spin gold and babysit my future children and all that good stuff.

I kinda gave up. I began to think I would just forgo an image and have nothing but the text.  The only things I could think of were--hm, how shall I put it--well, you'll see.  Here is a mere sampling of what I began to think would be totally appropriate to put on our invites:

Source 

Potatoes! Kevin and I really like eating potatoes! Mashed, pan roasted, fries, gratin, you name it, we love potatoes!

Source

 Our new vacuum cleaner! We love it! Sometimes we open the closet to peek at it.  A clean home brings harmony to our relationship. Vroom! Vroom!

Source

 Kevin and I rather like these little pug bums.  Maybe, like, a bouquet of pug butts?

Source

 And a pain killer. Any pain killer. Because at that point it seemed like a really good idea.

As you can see, while one can certainly call these "inspired", perhaps it's not "inspired" in a good way.  So what did I find at 1:30 am furiously searching the internet? An artichoke!

No, I'm serious. We're doing an artichoke.

What parts of the planning, if any, threw you close to decompensation?

Is That a Ring in Your Pocket?

Per my directive of "try again" after Kevin proposed the first time, Kevin took it to heart and tried proposing a few more times.

Proposal #2

I don't even remember when exactly Proposal #2 happened, but I do know that Kevin treated me to a very lovely and special meal at Daniel restaurant.  I thought this could be the night he proposed.

So before we go to dinner, I look at Kevin in his fine suit, all handsome:

Then I look closer, and see this:

Well gee whiz. What the hell could that be. It makes me laugh thinking about it, because it escapes my imagination how he thought I wasn't going to notice.  I burst out laughing, and the "surprise" was ruined. There was a bit of an awkward moment as we could have gone ahead with the "will you marry me?" part, but somehow it got decided to yet again, put it away for another day.

Proposal #3

Kevin and I were about to go spend a week in Cape Cod in summer 2008.  I noticed that when he was packing, he was secretive about the whole thing, and at one point when I reached for his bag he wrapped his arms around it like it was a hapless babe, his eyes got real big, and he said "No!!"  This guy has no poker face.  So endearing.

While staying on Cape Cod, we took daily early morning walks on the beach.

One day (happened to be my birthday) we're headed out the door to go take our daily walk and he abruptly stops, mutters, goes back into the room and comes out with a shoulder bag. Veerrrryyy subtle.  It was cute, and I could tell he was nervous so I just went about my way.

So we're walking, the beach is nice and empty, and he gets down on one knee and asks me to marry him.  And that's that.

And how, you may ask, was my appearance for this special occasion?

Haaawwwtttt.  Hey, he still asked, didn't he?

Let's hear others' proposal stories, whether single or multiple!

Here's a Ring, Now Light a Match

The story of how Kevin and I met isn't terribly interesting.  We were set up by a friend.  For our first date, he suggested going to a cafe that offered a ginormous amount of baked goods. So we got married (he had me at the baked goods!).

from Natalie Dee

The story of our engagement, however, is a little more interesting.  I spoke about it in general terms here, but to get a little more specific, there was a big time lag in between the first time that Kevin showed me the engagement ring and when we became officially engaged.  I was proposed to multiple times (a la one of my fave bees ever, Mrs. Ladybug).  And no, it's not that I rejected him the first few times--I knew we were going to get married--but it was more that I rejected his proposal method multiple times.

"Proposal" #1

It's around the winter holidays, and I know that Kevin probably already has my ring.  Why? Because we picked it out together eons ago and Mr. Smooth accidentally emailed me instead of the jeweler to announce that he wanted to move ahead with the purchase. Hehe.

We spent some time with my family over the holidays and I think there must have been some pressure for Kevin to propose and give me my damn ring, because he "proposed" when we got back to our apartment in NYC.

And where, oh where, did this hallowed event take place? Feast your eyes on this beaut of a locale.

I mean, he must have spent who knows how many minutes thinking about, of all the places in NYC at which he could propose to me, how our bathroom would be the ideal spot.

I was stepping out of the shower, had just picked up my towel (so yes, basically nekkid), and Kevin comes in and says "Look, here" or something unintelligible like that, and shoves the ring in my face. Ha!  I mean, what if I had been doing something else right then? Like #2??

To be fair, this was not (at least, it better not have been) the way he wanted to propose, but with the pressure he was feeling, he wanted to at least show me that he had the ring.  I think my response was something like "what do you want me to do with this" and "try again".

Next time, two more proposals.

Anybody get proposed to more than once?